Poem by Simon
Read the hilarious Tassie Tour poem by Dr Woods!
Updated: 9th March 2010
Tassie East Coast Tour
Read another hilarious peom by Dr Simon Woods about the beautiful and undulating east coast..
They lie, those folk who tell you,
For reasons of their own,
That the wind blows down the East Coast,
And hills are here unknown, Tassie has a history,
Of suffering and pain,
The convicts had no say in it,
But how do we explain?
What possesses normal folk,
(Or normal near enough)
To stuff themselves in Lycra
And then ride until they're stuffed?
Now I recall, I learned at school,
About techtonic drift
And how the Himalayas formed,
And Africa’s Great Rift,
I thought it took a billion years,
It seems that’s not quite right, ‘Cause down here in Tasmania,
Mountains rise up overnight
The first day’s profile map was flat,
Which seemed a little strange,
As Launceston’s surrounded,
By a mighty mountain range,
We headed off to Evandale,
To see Phil show his class,
The guys that beat him cheated,
Being young, and fit, and fast.
Day 2 the ride got serious,
The hill’s were tough for sure, For some the Alltrails ride became,
The Alltrails walking tour, The squiggles on the profile map,
Appeared completely random, And mutiny was plotted on,
The back seat of a tandem.
Day 3 and we climbed up and up,
We reached 600 metres,
And then another climb appeared,
That didn’t even feature,
As we struggled to the summit,
It was Phil who broke the news, They’d moved the cheese shop,
10 ks – since the last time he went through.
Day 4 and the wind was strong,
Which came as no surprise,
To those whose roommates gourmandised,
On curried scallop pies,
Some went around the mountain,
To check out Falmouth’s sights, Seems a rubbish bin, and letter box,
Were certain to excite
Day 5 was just a little cruise,
To Swansea for a rest,
Mark, the lone long router,
Went to Coles Bay as a test, He’s the man who sets the pace,
Alas for him - a one horse race, While down the back us also rans,
Are stalked each day, by JB’s van.
And then day 6 - a day of rest,
Now what’s that mean for us?
Coffee and croissants in bed,
No – let’s try and race the bus, Off we went to Freycinet,
To join Phil for a hike,
It seemed we would have got more rest,
By staying on the bike
Now we’ve slogged our way up mountains,
And we’ve hurtled down some hills, And always been looked after well,
By JB, Sue and Phil
Soon the ride will be completed,
And I’m sure we’ve all had fun, Treasured memories will linger like,
The pain in Katy’s bum,
